Sunday, November 09, 2008

Turn the other cheek so I can punch that too

We all know that the disciples of Jesus love a good fight. Whether it's a Crusade, a holy bombing or just a bit of a punch up there they are armed to the teeth and champing at the bit.

Latest fight news from the ringside says that it's a tie between the Armenian monks and the Greek Orthodox contenders whose latest bout took place on the holiest of holy sites - that of the Edicule, the supposed last but one resting place of the Lord's heavyweight champ Jesus.

"Trouble flared as Armenians prepared to mark the annual Feast of the Cross. Shocked pilgrims looked on as decorations and tapestries were toppled during Sunday's clash. Dressed in the vestments of the Greek Orthodox and Armenian denominations, rival monks threw punches and anything they could lay their hands on...

"An Armenian clergyman said the Greek clergy had tried to place one of their monks inside the Edicule, an ancient structure which is said to encase the tomb of Jesus."What is happening here is a violation of status quo. The Greeks have tried so many times to put their monk inside the tomb but they don't have the right to when the Armenians are celebrating the feast," he said."

It all seems so reasonable now it's been explained. Some tosser tried to take part in their religious ceremony, but he was fucking Greek of all things. No wonder they tried to beat him up, that's outrageous behavior far from "Orthodox". That's almost as bad as being gay or something.

It puts me in mind of the parable where Jesus beat the guy up for being a Samaritan. Peace be with you all.

Vicky has spotted brawling nuns in Italy, and I quote;

"Mr Esposito told police that the priest hit him over the head with a chair and the nuns followed by kicking him. Police say witnesses saw three attackers throwing tables and chairs then turning on the owner."


weggis said...

Yes, fell off me chair when I heard this on the news at half time during the Radio 5 commentary on the Spurs match. Three sendings off and two cautions – that’s the match not the Jesus thing.

Spurs had the effrontery to place the ball in the Manchester City net twice by a player called “BENT”. The City of Manchester Stadium faithful, the holy shrine of straight Football, were not amused, but the manager, Mark Hughes was philosophical. Meanwhile the home of Orthodox football, White Hart Lane, continues its resurgence under the watchful eye of Arry Redknapp.

Noel Lynch said...

Yes, I read about those nuns. They were both in their 70's. As anybody who ever went to a nuns school will know, you don't cross the nuns!

I didn't go to a nun's school, but when my class visited one, the nuns gave us catapults.