The signs of Lewisham

Having spent a fair bit of time tramping the streets of Lewisham recently I've been getting to know the area a little better. One thing I've noticed is the Lewishonian (is that the term?) tendency for amusing signs. You may remember we heard about how "they" want your "pod" a while back, well here are a few more for your delectation (you can click them to enlarge if need be).

First we have this, a simple spelling error - but one clearly induced by a Freudian slip. I like it not just because I get to pointing out that someone doesn't know the difference between caught and court - God knows my spelling is bad enough to make a saint weep - but it's that little element to the mistake where they are obviously thinking about the law when writing this and that thought process slipped in unnoticed. Nice.


Next we have this this sign on a portaloo, which rather tickled me. If you click the picture you'll see the no smoking sign reads "It is against the law to smoke in these premises." I'd never thought of a three foot square toilet as "premises" before - well, it made me laugh.


This one is a little dodgy. The thing is, there are so many mistakes I wondered whether it was actually deliberate. The sign is placed on the inside entrance of a small block of flats. "pleases will all residence closes this door as it is in the interesse of security of all residence." I suppose it could be some sort of postmodern joke... if so it escapes me.


Here we have a couple of signs next to a playgrounds garden. The lighting is not perfect so you may have to take my word for it when I say that one sign reads "can you see them growing." referring to some sunflowers that have been planted. Now, I don't want to get accused of fascism or anything but would a question mark rather than a full stop really have been so out of place here? I mean, we're talking about an educational establishment, get with it people!


Same garden. This time we appear to have rather mixed messages going on. Do they want us to come or stop? These people want to have their cake and eat it - but I'm a traditionalist and I'll not do both at once.


Lastly, and this is my favourite of them all partly because it's Lewisham council who've stuffed it up this time. I agree that rubbish should be disposed of - but do I really have to sing to it in the process?