Spanking: good fun?

I've always liked the idea of a good spanking. One of my favourite stories from the Russian Revolution involves a quadruple rank of sailors, bayonets bristling, threatening to spank the Menchevik MP's who were demanding to come through their line. [link lines 114 to 129]

But whilst the idea of a pair of soundly paddled buttocks can clearly raise a frisson of creative sexual tension, in some quarters, the actual practice can have a tendency to fail to live up to expectations. I expect. I can't say the prospect of red raw, flabby cheeks delivered, ham acting style, by a frayed and inexpert fake-madame does much except to raise a blush. Of embarrassment.

An idle day dream of a flexed cane or snapped ruler can spark a thrill, but the genuine possibility of being soundly beaten by a master practitioner of flagellation seems a rather thin gruel compared to an authentically carnal liaison. Or is that just me?

Having fun is something invaluable in every aspect of our lives and clearly sexual fantasy is part of that. But imagine the horror of some over the hill Lothario, flaccid member in hand, resplendent in judge's wig and strategically parted robes. It's enough to put you off your buttie, isn't it?

You may say the accoutrement's of playful wickedness, the fluffy handcuffs, silk blindfold or studded leather choker are simply spicy accessories to help sate an otherwise jaded palette. Perhaps you're right, but I wonder where the root of the attraction lies.

The old stereo type of the elite white male in a powerful job by day and lashed to a dungeon rack by night can't be all the answer surely. Although, having said that, I've always assumed High Court Judges insatiably seek out ever more esoteric deviations. I believe it's how they get the job in the first place.

So many people get a cheap thrill from flirting with soft sadomasochistic ideas that it can seem positively unorthodox at times to desire rather plainer and more straightforward pleasures.

Does the desire to submit perhaps come from the desire to be desired? To be the object of another's overwhelming passion and attention. The skill of an accomplished aficionado involves the provocation of the senses, forcibly extracting unwilling confessions and dark pleasures. I would have thought.

I wonder where the skill of the passive subject lies? To strain against their bonds without breaking them, to arch their back or bite their lips in aesthetically pleasing ways? To signal their pleasure whilst being absolved of all responsibility for those desires. Rewarding their captor with the medals of a successfully conducted campaign.

Someone once described sex as two people trying to climb inside one another. Leaving aside the poverty of their ambitions I think it is this desire to be touched beyond the bounds where our natural self defence mechanisms will normally allow perhaps brings us towards the kernel of why the pleasure of submission is so attractive to many. Why the idea of the ruthless disciplinarian raises the prospect of a safe space where we are not just the object of exotic passion but are simply not allowed to raise our hands to keep others at arms length... More on this another time.